


The Ledge

by hurluberlu



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe, Assisted Suicide, Castiel is Jimmy Novak, Cop Castiel, Depression, Drunk Driving, Fluff, Hospital, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, No Smut, Oneshot, Pills, Police Officer Castiel, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Underage - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-23
Updated: 2016-03-23
Packaged: 2018-05-28 11:47:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6327727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hurluberlu/pseuds/hurluberlu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"If you could undo these handcuffs, you could see how horny I really am."</p><p>"Not happening."</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Ledge

Dean hit the steering wheel, screaming internally as he swerved on the road, half a dozen bottles of beer coursing throughout his veins. He pulled his car to a sudden stop on the edge of the road, slinging his car door open as he stumbled out. He fell to his knees, placing his hands out in front of him, pushing his body up like a toddler learning to walk.

He ran, _staggered_ , from his car and onto the unlit bridge, pushing his weight up only to fall back to the road. He laughed and stood up again, successfully climbing onto the railing.

Dean slowly turned his head as he heard the tires of another car come down the road, along with blaring police sirens. He glanced down at the calming river beneath the bridge, smiling as he tiptoed closer to the edge.

"Hey! Get down from there!"

Dean closed his eyes as he heard feet getting closer, feeling his body lean forward as he prepared to fall.

Dean gasped as he felt his body be pulled back onto the road, his head hitting the cement as his vision went black and his body limp.

Dean woke up to a blinding white light. He tried to lift his hands to cover his eyes, finding them unable to lift. Dean reopened his eyes, looking down to find himself in a hospital gown, in a hospital bed.

"Morning sunshine. How's your head?"

Dean looked up to see a cheery-faced doctor staring down at him. "Who the fuck are you?"

The doctor smiled and looked over to a chair, speaking to someone Dean couldn't see. Dean closed his eyes. Biting his lips, he clenched his fists and listened to his steady heart monitor.

Dean opened his eyes to the feeling of someone shaking his shoulders. "Alright, alright I'm fucking awake."

The doctor nodded to the chair Dean couldn't see. "I'll leave you alone with the officer here, but you'll need to stay in the hospital for at least a few days."

Dean watched as the doctor left the room and the other man came to his bedside.

"Why'd you do that? You're just a kid."

Dean swallowed and looked up, watching the man's eyes blink quickly.

"Why does it matter? I'm guessing it was you who pulled me back, huh?"

The man nodded and took one of Dean's hands.

"Dude, lay off. I don't know who you are or why the fuck you thought you would be the 'hero' and try to save me, but I don't need your help. You should've just let me die."

The man pulled away, scanning Dean's face as Dean's emerald eyes started to close. "Why? Why should I have let you die?"

"Did you ever think that there was a reason I was on that bridge? A reason why I want to die?"

"Yes I did. But you're not even eighteen...it was probably a stupid reason."

Dean pulled against his restraints, jumping up in his bed as his head started to spin. "Fuck you dude."

Dean fell back onto the bed as his head started to ache and he slipped back into darkness.

Dean woke up to see the doctor's face again, reaching over him as he fixed an IV. Dean smiled and leaned up in bed, scanning the doctor's face with drowsy eyes. "Hey there sexy."

The doctor looked down and smiled politely, finishing with the bag and walking outside of the door. He looked over to one of the chairs, barely seeing the outline of a man. "Would ya mind coming on over here sweet thing?"

The officer stood up, cautiously nearing the bedside.

Dean smiled up at him, his eyes glittering as they focused completely on the officer's lips. "I don't know what they've got me on, but it's fucking great. I can only think of one thing that could make it better."

The officer shook his head as he said down next to Dean's legs on the bed. "You go from depressed and suicidal to high and...horny, in the span of a few hours of unconsciousness. I don't know how you manage it. What's your name, by the way?"

Dean ignored the officer, motioning over to a key on the bedside table. "If you could undo these handcuffs, you could see how horny I really am."

The officer laughed and grabbed the key, slipping it into his pocket. "Not happening."

Dean sighed and turned his head, looking out of the only window in his room. "Aww, you're no fun. The name's Dean by the way, I think you asked about that earlier."

The officer smiled and stood up, walking to the doorway. "I know, I was just seeing if you would actually tell me your name." The officer walked out, and Dean closed his eyes again, exhausted.

Dean stayed in the bed for three days. The only two people he ever saw were his doctor and the officer, who was always there when he woke up and went to sleep. On the day of his discharge he was sent out with practically a bucketful of antidepressants and a few pain medications.

He slipped into his clothes, ripped but cleaned from all of his blood. He felt the top of his head, wincing as he pressed against the bandage on his scalp.

Dean looked out of his room to see the officer standing there, in full uniform, ready to take him home.

Dean scoffed and walked past him, heading out of the hospital on his own. The officer hurriedly followed behind. "Why are you following me?"

The officer caught the lobby door before it smacked him in the face, shaking his head as he followed Dean outside. "You don't have a car, I have to take you home. But you'll have to tell me where that is."

Dean continued to walk along the sidewalk, fully content with walking the entire way home. "Why does it matter? Hopefully by this time tomorrow I'll be dead and gone."

The officer ran in front of Dean, turning around and grabbing the released patient's shoulders. "Why are you so intent on killing yourself?"

Dean turned his head and looked to the ground. "That's for me to know and you to not find out. Look, I'll let you drive me home, but stop asking questions okay?"

The officer nodded and dragged Dean to his patrol car, pushing him into the passenger seat. Dean instructed him on how to get to his apartment and the two rode in complete silence.

When they arrived at the apartment building Dean practically jumped out of the car and the officer watched as he ran into the lobby. He shook his head and pulled his car out of the parking lot as Dean made it into his apartment and onto his couch, so exhausted he was out when he hit the cushion.

Dean awoke a few hours later plagued with thoughts of the days before. He let the events run through his head as he laid on the couch, staring up at the ceiling. Standing on the bridge with that officer, and waking up on the hospital to see his face.

Dean shook his head and stood up, planning on having as much of a 'normal' afternoon as possible. As he walked into the kitchen he grabbed a discarded beer bottle and took a sip. Dean opened his fridge to find nothing in it besides curdled milk and enough alcohol to last the average man years.

He grabbed two bottles, closing the fridge door and making a mental note to buy food, a note he would surely not need, more or less remember.

By three, he had already emptied the bottles and was mindlessly laying on his couch. He slowly let his eyes close, only for a few seconds, before he shot up at the sound of his doorbell.

Dean struggled to stand up, stumbling to the door. He swung it open, almost slamming it closed when he saw who it was.

"Hello Dean."

"What the hell are you doing here?"

The officer smiled and stepped into Dean's apartment with no hesitation.

"I thought I should come check on you, make sure you weren't 'dead and gone' yet."

Dean let his hand shut the door, otherwise motionless.

"I don't need you to babysit me."

The officer took a seat on the couch covered in empty glass bottles. Dean walked over and brushed the cushion off, the man wincing from the sound of glass crashing to the floor.

"So what do you want from me? Do you want me to tell you I'm not gonna kill myself, or did you just want to annoy me by showing up to my house?"

The officer cleared his throat and placed his hands on his knees.

"I wanted to know why you want to kill yourself so badly. Talking about your problems is the first step to fixing them-"

"Well I _tried_...to _fix_ them, but you wouldn't let me, remember? If you would have just let me jump-"

Dean was interrupted by a pair of warm lips on his. Before he could react, the officer had pulled away.

He looked down at his hands in his lap as Dean stared at his lips.

"Well officer, if I didn't know any better I'd say you were trying to take advantage of me. And I don't even know your name."

Dean smirked as he climbed onto the officer's lap, tangling his fingers into the man's hair. "You have a special kink for alcoholic, suicidal kids? Or are you just curious?"

"Dean I just want t-"

Dean leaned forward, his tongue exploring the boundaries of the officer's mouth. Dean pulled back as the officer started to push against his chest.

"Call me Novak."

Dean nodded and ran his hands up Officer Novak's uniformed torso. "Well Novak, I'd thought I'd tell you that I'm on quite a cocktail of meds and alcohol, so I could pass out at anytime. But I'm still down for sex if that's what you want."

The officer shook his head and placed his hands on Dean's shoulders. "Dean, you need help. You're suicidal and being on all these drugs is not going to help you at all. You're not even old enough to drink."

Dean tilted his head and pouted his lip. "Not old enough to drink. Not old enough to fuck. How are teenagers supposed to have any fun? See why I want to kill myself yet?"

Novak sighed and pushed Dean to the side. "This isn't something to joke about Dean. I want to know, I _need_ to know why you're trying to kill yourself!"

Dean snarled and stood up from his couch, stumbling to his doorway. He pulled open his front door, holding out his hand, gesturing for the officer to get out. "You don't need to fucking know. Just get out of my apartment and let me be. No one will miss me, and I don't see why you've taken on this 'mission' of stopping me."

The officer stood from his spot on the couch, wincing from the sound of a few more bottles hitting the floor. He tiptoed his way to the door, which was still being held open by a very impatient Dean, as he dodged the bottles that were spread about the room like landmines. He sadly looked up to Dean's face, giving a single, weary nod as he took a step forward to exit Dean's apartment.

Dean grabbed his arm forcefully, stopping Novak's walking as the officer's hand flew to where Dean's grip sent a wave of pain.

"Dean-"

"Why'd you kiss me?"

Novak peeled Dean's fingers from his arm, throwing Dean's hand down. "Doesn't matter."

Dean laughed and shook his head, slamming his door shut as he leaned his back against it. "No no no, you can't do that to me. 'I _need_ to know'."

The officer shook his head and took a step back, turning his back to Dean as he rubbed his forehead. "That's not even fair. That's not even comparable."

Dean let his head lean back and hit the door, crossing his arms over his chest. "How is it not?"

Novak turned around with an incredulous look on his face. "Are you serious? Suicide versus a two second kiss? How would they ever be comparable?"

"Because my life matters about as much to me as a two second kiss."

Novak sighed and placed a hand on the doorknob, attempting to open it. Dean went to grab the officer's wrist, a gasp escaping his lips as his arms were pinned above his head, banging loudly against the door. Dean smirked and looked up to his arms, gently pulling on them to watch them stay motionless. "Getting a little rough, officer-"

"What has gone so god damned wrong in your life that the only answers are sarcasm, alcohol and suicide?"

Dean cleared his throat and looked down to the floor. "I told you, you don't need to know. I appreciate your concerns, but they won't change my mind."

Novak watched as Dean lifted his head, a few tears spilling from bloodshot eyes. He brought his lips forward, gently kissing a tear as it cascaded down Dean's rosy cheeks. "You know, I've never understood why people do that. Is it supposed to make me feel better?"

The officer ignored Dean, taking his lips to another tear. "Do they taste good or something?"

Novak pulled back, lessening his grip on Dean's arms. "When will you try again?"

Dean shrugged. "Probably when you leave. Or when I wake up tomorrow morning. Haven't decided."

The officer leaned his forehead against Dean's. "Would anything change your mind?"

Dean watched as Novak closed his eyes, taking a hard swallow. "No."

"So...after I leave?"

Dean silently nodded.

"What if I don't leave?"

Dean laughed and watched the officer's eyes open again. "You have to."

"Why?"

"Don't you have a wife? A family?"

The officer laughed and kissed the end of Dean's nose. "Does it seem like I have a wife?"

Dean let out a soft laugh as he scanned Novak's face. "Hey, you could be in a closet for all I know."

The officer shook his head as he slowly ran his hands down Dean's arms, down his torso, and they rested on Dean's hips. "Nothing will change your mind."

"Nothing."

Novak let his hands travel down to Dean's ass, pushing up against each cheek as he lifted Dean's body. Dean wrapped his legs around the officer's waist, smiling as he stared into the officer's eyes. "Then I guess I should make your last a night to remember."

The pair traveled to the worn out couch, Dean apologizing as Novak sat him down on the hard cushion. "Sorry, I don't exactly have a bed."

The officer shook his head, straddling Dean's hips as he unbuttoned his blue shirt. "I don't mind."

 

Dean awoke early the next morning, his body warm as he looked to his side, seeing the officer sleeping beside him on the tiny couch. He stood up from the couch, making sure to not disturb the other man as he stood up and bent down to pick up the officer's shirt. Dean slipped it on, not bothering to button it as he walked to his bathroom.

He didn't bother to turn on the light, grabbing the bottle of pills he knew would be there, opening it as he grabbed a cup and filled it with water. He downed the bottle, around ten pills, and took a sip of the water, smiling into the dark mirror as he turned back to go lay on the couch.

Dean sat on the cushion, jumping when he felt the officer place a hand on his thigh. "Did you take the pills?"

Dean nodded silently. The officer sighed and placed his head over his hand on Dean's leg. "Good luck in the afterlife."

Dean smiled and leaned his head back onto the arm of the couch, closing his eyes. "Thanks."


End file.
